Wednesday, July 15, 2009

TWITTER? Didn't even KNOW her!

Elephant Journal named me one of their Top Ten Buddhists to Follow on Twitter. I'm right above that scumbag charlatan Genpo Roshi!

So follow me on Twitter, but just don't get so into my tweets that you end up like girl who died in her bathtub while on Twitter.

If you really must know what I tweeted last it's that I'll be hosting the usual zazen at 10 am this Saturday July 18th at 237 Hill St. Santa Monica 90405. But don't park in the lot because it's being used that day for some event at the church. This will be a regular sitting not one of the all-day things. That will be on July 25th. Sunday July 19th at 11am I'll host zazen at Against The Stream, 4300 Melrose Ave LA 90029.

Some of the people on that top ten list apparently send out "Dharma Tweets," pithy little quotes to help boost your practice or some such thing. Some of Genpo's include, "You have to be willing to face your fear and go through your doubt and let it all go," and "The question is how to listen not with your ears but with your whole being." Awwww. Isn't that sweet? Taken right out of Shunryu Suzuki's books without credit! Just like the name Big Mind®! Lama Surya Das says, "Love is far greater than our likes or dislikes," and "My body is the entire universe, all beings my heart and soul. You are no different." Oh, I feel so Enlightened now!

My most pithy comment so far has been "All poop was once someone's food." Other than that I have revealed on Twitter that I have not one but two (2) Neil Diamond compilations, one of which is a boxed set. I once tweeted that I was at Astro Burger when I learned that my cell phone can access the Internet. But it was such a pain to do it I don't think I'll be doing remote tweets anymore. Anyhow, maybe I should try and come up with something more Zen-y. The marketing thing, y'know. Mainly I just mention where I'll be talking next.

Dharma Tweets are stupid, by the way. They're not honest expressions of anything, just a ploy to keep folks who follow them hanging on and keep the person who posts them's name in the public eye. As if you could put anything worthwhile into 140 characters. Still, I guess I'm gonna have to get with the whole marketing thing if I want to be able to keep eating at Astro Burger following the loss of the Suicide Girls gig.


Anonymous said...

One is the loneliest number!

Anonymous said...

you can do it, brad. tweet hard.

Anonymous said...

"I tweet thereore I am"

Or pithy Zen Tweets




"Something not important"


"Pay attention to your own life and get out of mine"


"Am I the real Brad Warner or a tweet-a-like"

Anonymous said...

What's the sound of one hand twittering?

WH said...

your welcome


Scumbag Charlatan said...

You're so insecure. Lama Surya Dass's enlightenment is way shinier than yours and bigger too.

Mr. Reee said...

Let's see how this Tweetie thingy works:

"I'm at the gas station again."

"I've got a flat. Kids next door let the air out."

"A bird just pooped on my hood."

"That other PT has smoothie rims and moon caps. I need those."

Hmmm. I dunno. Hard to imagine anyone wanting to know about these things.

Anonymous said...

I've never used Twitter. I only succumbed to Facebook after ages, old bugger :)

Anonymous said...

Just saw this:,28348,25789691-5014239,00.html

Mysterion said...

Different approaches to happiness and suffering
There are different approaches to happiness. The Western approach focuses on positive feelings, positive actions, and positive lives. It seeks to maximize pleasure and minimize pain. Suffering is considered a foreign, hostile intrusion into our happy existence. However, when suffering can no longer be avoided, then one tries to trump suffering through positive psychology. The Western approach works best in a culture of progress, affluence and hope.
The Eastern approach focuses on wisdom, patience, detachment and serenity. It seeks to develop and master our inner lives so that we can transcend suffering. The transformation of suffering is achieved through wisdom and enlightenment. The Eastern approach works best in a culture of suffering and endurance.
The existential approach focuses on responsibility, choice and actions in the midst of chaos, absurdity and sufferings. It seeks to overcome suffering and absurdity through an courageous act of acceptance. For example, happiness is pushing a heavy rock uphill over and over again, in spite of the absurdity and futility of this exercise. This approach works best in a culture of meaninglessness and despair.
The Christian approach focuses on finding happiness and life through embracing suffering and death, as exemplified by Christ on the cross, and taught by Christ in his Sermon on the Mount. Happiness is not the absence of suffering, but the surrendering of suffering to God as an offering. This approach works best in a culture of faith and love.
All four approaches recognize that the pursuit of happiness necessarily involves coming to terms with the reality of suffering, although they address the problem of suffering from very different cultural, religious and philosophical perspectives.

Frog said...

The old pond
A frog jumped in,

Translated by Allen Ginsberg

Gee, only 41 characters.

Say more than some crap you say in 41 paragraphs.

Lezley Zen said...

I haven't checked this blog in 6 months. I"ll check again in a year. Maybe.

Travis said...

btw, you can tweet just by sending a text message from your phone. No need to use the interweb or any such scary thing.

Anonymous said...

how tweet it is!

Anonymous said...

I'm done with Brad. He's negative. He puts others down and for the very things he's done and said. He thinks his shit doesn't stink. He doesn't practice what he teaches... he sure knows a lot, but why is he so angry? He said Zen is not an anything-goes philosophy but why was he writing on a porn site? Why does he swear so much? Why is he so sarcastic?

Is being "punk" some how a justification? If he thinks so, he needs to get past that and grow up a little.

"Dharma Tweets are stupid, by the way. They're not honest expressions of anything, just a ploy to keep folks who follow them hanging on and keep the person who posts them's name in the public eye. As if you could put anything worthwhile into 140 characters."

Well then, why are you on Twitter? Should I skip every other 140 words of your books? Yes I have all three and I thank you for helping me get back into Buddhism... but I am not following you anymore... on Twitter or otherwise. I hope you find a way to be happier, you don't write like you are happy.

Mudo said...

Christ. Based on this post I'm actually beginning to like you. I'm sure that will change.

Mudo said...

And that photo makes me nervous. That bird's gonna shit in that girl's mouth in a second.

Anonymous said...

ok, I'm lame
just what is twitter and how can I get tweets?

annoying mouse said...

At 26/6/07,
Blogger Mysterion said...

Dead Pond
Jumping Frog
Sound of Water

In a (heretofore) Lifeless (complete stillness) Pond (Universe)
A Jumping Frog (Life)
Makes a Quick Splash

Life is just a brief interruption in the great stillness of nirvana.

I will never accuse Ginsberg...

Hey-nonny-nonny-mouse said...

Discussing yourself in the third person now, Mysti?

What can you be trying to tell us?

Jinzang said...

As if you could put anything worthwhile into 140 characters.

The dewdrop world is a dewdrop world and yet and yet
(tsuyu no yo wa tsuyu no yo nagara sari nagara)

Café Zen said...

It's also impossible to "put anything worthwhile" Dharma-wise into 140 books, but so what?

Blake said...

I am so pissed that I didn't make the list! Not really.

Lama Surya Das is following me on Twitter. That's just weird.

Mumon said...

I don't get Twitter at all. I have an account but have not used it.

So you can follow me on Twitter.

Apuleius Platonicus said...

Twitter isn't even evil. It's just banal.

Tornadoes28 said...

Who cares what Genpo tweets. Why do you care? You need to worry less about people like Genpo and just concentrate on yourself.

Anonymous said...

Hi Jinzang,

Please give your interpretation of
"and yet and yet".

(I'm a numbskull; after many years,
I still don't get it :(

This is not a comment. said...

I am sorry that you lost the SG gig. I was/am a fan of the 'porno buddist'/ break out of the Zen getto idea. I hope you can find a new gig soon.
I second the prevoius post recommending a collected edition. Something with an SG girl on every left hand page and an article on every right hand page. I don't know if I would buy it being poor, but I would lust after it in the bookshop.
I also second the newspaper idea. Perhaps you could follow the path Dan Savage blazed up here in Seattle. His local sex collum in the free newspaper has morphed into an editor gig and national syndication. I for one would love to see Zen getting even half the exposure of "Savage Love".

Oh and less than 140 keystrokes
Ceci n'est pas une pipe

Severino42 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Severino42 said...

Twitter is where marketing people talk to themselves. I recommend you do not waste your time there. In 5 years I predict we are all going to be laughing at how silly we were to expect to get anything out of twitter. But then maybe you are interested in getting nothing?

BTW I like your books, and follow your blog. On a blog you can actually say something.

I like the recent angry tone others have disparaged. I am also out of work and it lines up with my own angry tone. It is what is here, now. This too shall pass.

ZenLeo said...

A bit of anecdotal information as to why Brad is so angry. I know many divorced people as I'm sure many of you do as well. I have found that the experience of divorce has turned some mild-manored friends into bitter mean-spirited people. The change was shocking to me in a few instances, instead of a level-headed response to life and anything, they would be attacking and bitter. I believe this may be at the bottom of Brads somewhat unlogical negativity. (Negative reactions can be good when appropriate.)

ZenLeo said...

...Oh and to be topical, why is twitter causing so much trouble?

"L'enfer, c'est les autres", Jean-Paul Sartre

.... as if you didn't know

C.W.Brown said...

Brad, if you set up your phone on Twitter you can tweet by sending a text message to 40404.

Jinzang said...

Please give your interpretation of "and yet and yet".

Aitken Roshi has written a book about the Zen interpretation of some famous haiku, including this one, A Zen Wave. You can read Rosh's interpretation if you "search inside" for Issa.

Jinzang said...

why Brad is so angry

Brad was like this before he was divorced. What seems like anger to you comes across as sarcasm to me.

Karl Rove said...

Brad was like this before he was divorced. What seems like anger to you comes across as sarcasm to me

He is one of those people who can seem mild mannered on the outside when you meet them in person or see them on a video, but who is also pretty mean and a little vindictive inside. It often comes out in their writings and actions more than spoken words.

Many very angry and tightly wound people seem soft spoken on the outside. Some of us have known him for a long time. Brad is the Karl Rove of Zen.

Smoggyrob said...

Hi everyone:

I'm with Jinzang -- Brad doesn't strike me as angry either.

On behalf of Dogen Sangha Los Angeles (DSLA), I'd like to invite you to sit with us at the Hill Street Center in Santa Monica on Saturday, July 25, 2009, for an "All-Day Sesshin". Brad is in town and may lay down some wisdom afterward, or maybe he'll just start a conversation.

Walk-ins are welcome to join our regular Saturday practice (like on July 18 & August 1), but please RSVP this all-day sesshin in advance, by Wednesday, July 22. You can do that by sending an email to me at

Please, feel free to come sit with us if you're in town. DSLA is a group of friendly, supportive, easy-going people, dedicated to the communal practice of shikantaza zazen. When I first started sitting with them I found a sudden circle of cool friends an immediate fruit of sangha.

I look forward to sitting with you.


Mysterion said...

Carl Rove said:
"It often comes out in their writings"

Well Carl Rove would never butcher English enough to turn Brad into a their and make the uncountable verb 'writing' into a plural. Unless, of course, he has taken of the waters...

p.s. I only write of the Swami in the third person. The Office of The Swam prefers it that way. (Nixonian disconnect intended).

I never knew or cared that Ginsberg has a take on Basho. Howl was all I ever needed to see from the original Twit. I am just not of that era. Sorry.

Tornadoes28 said...

I didn't say he was angry. I just think he needs to stop with the insults and the criticism of Genpo. Whatever happened to Buddhist compassion. He just seems to be more worried about people like Genpo which does make him appear insecure.

By the way, does Brad ever respond to comments?

Jakey Madball said...

I don't think Brad coms across as angry or unhappy, rather, he tells it as he sees it. I fall in and out of love with his writing which is probably more about how I'm feeling.

Anonymous said...

it appears that brad is waiting for that
bird to give him a big old "hot carl"



Anonymous said...

what I find surprising isn't so much Brad's remarks about Genpo's entrepreneurial take on dharma, but the fact that Brad is the only one I have come across remarking on trademarking of terms which by no means would be credited or ascribed to one person's creativity as their rightfully unique intellectual property.
Maezumi Roshi had quite a few followers, they may be 'tsk-tsking' in private, but I don't know of anyone who has made any statements about the absurdity and the wrongness of this kind of co opting of and marketing of dharma.
As a teacher, maybe he is yet one more of the examples of 'how not to,'-- there are so many such teachers around; apparently we need them!

There are quite a few self claimed so called buddhists who are also psychotherapists and seem to be using their sanghas as a way to broaden their client base.
They seem completely blind to the conflict of interest inherent in this.

I am not talking about pastoral counseling in which priests/ministers are helping church members reconcile conflicts of faith and life;
I am talking about the Kung-Fu-ization (kung phooey-ization) of psychotherapists who seem to think their therapeutic efforts are beyond reproach because of their magic buddha powers derived from their use of such things as:
mindfulness, compassion, skillful means and right livelihood etc...
I really don't want to see a mala on a therapist's wrist as if that means I can now trust them completely!
Please therapist guys and gals out there--just have a simple plain space to work in--ditch the incense burner, the japanese calligraphy and plug in water fountain paaaaaleeeze!

just a few thoughts about a couple of pet peeves of mine!

NellaLou said...

Buddha Inc. is alive and well. Spewing platitudes on Twitter to keep the masses fed on meaningless pablum. If Buddhadharma can be condensed to 140 characters what is the use of the Tripitaka? A sound bite is not a meal. Junk food for the starving.

Leaf Dharma said...

I'm assuming that's sarcasm rather than bitterness when you talk about being in 5th place asshole rather than a 6th place scumbag.

Brad you need some Zen Rehab.

tinkonthebrink said...

140 sincere characters moves me more than any number of glib, sarcastic words. Twitter is what you make of it, like everything else. I hope you feel better.

Hellen said...

Quite useful information, much thanks for this post.