Tuesday, April 28, 2009


Take a look at this article from the Canadian National Post. When I read the opening paragraphs I was like, "Man that guy gets a lot of action! I wish I got that much!"

It's funny how things seem when you read them as opposed to when you actually live through them. It's like when John Lennon started taking heat for his statement that The Beatles were bigger than Jesus. He said something like, "When I said Beatles I wasn't really thinking of us. I was thinking of those other Beatles, the ones that get in the papers all the time." I totally get that. It really does feel that way to me these days. I have no idea who this Brad Warner person people are getting all worked up about is. He sounds like a dick to me!

I wonder if I would even like "Brad Warner" if I wasn't Brad Warner. I think I'd probably be all aloof to him. Like I wouldn't even pay attention. That's how I was when Nirvana was big. These days I realize how great they were. I probably would have realized it even then if I'd bothered to listen. But they were so huge I just felt like they already had enough listeners. Besides, my bands had done that stuff five or ten years earlier and nobody had paid attention. Granted maybe we weren't doing it quite as well. But there were no innovations in Nirvana's music that I hadn't been associated with years before. I guess I mostly hated when people acted like Nirvana had invented everything.

Wow. That was a tangent!

Anyway, I'm not sure I'm anywhere near "the most visible Zen teacher in North America" as the article says. I'm not invisible, I guess. I'm still working on the serum for that.

I gotta run. I'll be at Casa del Popolo in Montreal tonight. Details are linked over there to your left. It should be a fun show. People drink beer there! I don't talk Zen to people drinking beer very often.

Oh! Fun facts you should know about Canada:

• The beer here is stronger than US beer. I'm not a drinker, but I'll have a beer every now and again (6 or 7 beers a year possibly). So I discovered this the hard way. I have an extremely low tolerance for alcohol and went over my very low limit (about 1 and a half in the US is enough to get me totally wasted) much faster than I expected. I'm going Straight Edge for the rest of the tour.

• The Sunday funnies are published in the Saturday paper! Weird!

I'll try to think of more fun Canada facts for next time.

And you Detroiters don't forget the Zero Defex gig May 1st. See the flyer to your left!


Apuleius Platonicus said...

Well, at least your not "big in Japan".

Anonymous said...

Oh shit...Brad had a beer. The shit is gonna hit the fan now!

Stephanie said...

Oh shit...Brad had a beer. The shit is gonna hit the fan now!

LOL! 'Hardcore Zen Teacher Brad Warner Gets Drunk After One Beer! News at 11!' I think that would just get you called a 'pussy boy' in Texas.

Anonymous said...

In Canada, Milk comes in bags.


Anonymous said...

Perhaps Brad could address the issue of flamboyant gay monks next?


Anonymous said...

One might think Brad would've got used to alcohol during his stay in Japan, where drinking practically a part of every social gathering and drunken people are a common sight in the late hours of the day (as are people sleeping outside in the early hours). Though the Japanese (and most Asian) people are less tolerant to alcohol than some of us Western people because of the differences in some enzyme due to their genetic makeup, so maybe his 'one and a half drinks' fits fine there.

Mysterion said...

his bradness sed:
"Wow. That was a tangent!"

Little tangents are bird walks.
Bigger tangents are duck walks (means two things).
Even bigger tangents are crane walks (also means two things).

If you were really stretching it, it would have been a crane walk...

p.s. the difference between a beer bottle and a xtian is that a beer bottle has a good chance at redemption.

ator said...

Canadians are into weird sports... like WWF and hockey

Stephanie said...

I got eaten alive by more bugs than I ever knew existed when I did a solitary retreat in Nova Scotia, including the lovely blackfly that leaves alarmingly large circular bites that bleed and bleed. My unofficial anthem for that trip was "The Mosquito Song" by Queens of the Stone Age.

Jinzang said...

Big in Japan. Eighties synth pop didn't die. It rotted on the vine.

Matt said...

HA! Brad mentioned beer! DUCK AND COVER!

London John said...

brad said:
"It's like when John Lennon started taking heat for his statement that The Beatles were bigger than Jesus."

1) The Beatles actually existed.
There is no consensus on Jesus. There is no support for the latter.
2. The Beales were on TV. No one living today has ever seen or talked to Jesus. Well, there are plenty of cheesy movies.

Yoko Ono, then and now.

Anonymous said...

mysterion can't get it all said as mysterion. Hence London John.

boy george said...

Jesus.. I hate that lame gay 80s boolshit. thanks for sharing Jinz.

Uku said...

Good article in National Post, thanks for sharing!

Take care, man.

Anonymous said...

Article is worth everything you pay your publicist. All the exaggerations show you should never believe your own press releases.

Anonymous said...

You're doin' us all proud--

Exraordinarily so

The emperor has no clothes story for buddhists is zen has no enlightenment

It is refreshing, albeit a mite stark...without the brocade: flesh and blood just like us!! And without enlightenment: the extraordinary special miraculousness of ordinary life!

I can't think of anyone else doing this for zenbuddhism
but it is right on time

Thank you

Phil said...

Hey the talk was a fun listen at Casa last night. I didn't come up and talk to you, didn't really have much to say. But I thought you handled the questions quite well. Cheers Brad!

jamal said...

Man I miss the ol Phil. That guy made me laugh.

Anonymous said...

Warner your idiot. Get some sense a put out s DVD.
-Gempoo Roshi

Mysterion said...

The real secret of Zazen:

"Flush With Pride"In the West, a lot of crap was force-fed into our little developing brains before we had a choice about what to avoid. Thank whatever gods may be that a lot of crap detectors already started alarming young thinkers to wake-the-fuck-up.

And, right on cue, D.T. Suzuki shows up on our shore and says "Flush With Pride." Then an anglican alcoholic named Watts shows up and says "Blush With Pride." And then a lessor Suzuki shows up on our shores and says "Flush With Pride."

Most recently, a fellow named Brad returns to our shores and says: "Flushed With Pride." And, you can manage your own handle, too! You don't need an anglican to come out of the water closet and pull your handle for you!

Sometimes, just sometimes...

Zazen is
the sound of a fart
the smell of shit.

And (thank whatever gods may be) that there is plenty of shit going around - some Big Mound Shit (BMS™) - some Take-a-Leak Shit (TLS™) - and even some Mysterion Shit (M.S.™) just to remind a few of ya what real shit™ smells like.


Anonymous said...

"I guess I mostly hated when people acted like Nirvana had invented everything."

-I think Kurt hated that too. For me, Nirvana was unlike anything I'd heard before, and I loved it. I'm glad they made it big because, generally, popular music at that time was sooooo lame.

-I'm Canadian, and milk hasn't come in bags here for years now. Cartons and jugs. Cartons and jugs.

Anonymous said...

Since when did milk come in jugs?

Anonymous said...

Milk jug.

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grisom said...

Hey, I live in Canada and my Sunday funnies come in the Sunday paper like God intended! Maybe it's a Quebec thing. Those crazy Frenchies :)

proulx michel said...

Well, Brad wouldn't have been reading the French papers, so you have to believe that it's some anglo-saxophone idiosyncrasy, here.

Anonymous said...

I’m canadian, and my milk comes in a bag.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

"I’m canadian, and my milk comes in a bag."

glad to hear canadians practice safe sex

Anonymous said...

"It's funny how things seem when you read them as opposed to when you actually live through them."

It's called propaganda.

Zack S said...

If you have time you must go to the Motown Museum!
It is a high holy temple and anyone who loves music must visit there once in lifetime.

un sex shop said...

This cannot have effect in actual fact, that's what I consider.

un sex shop said...

Here, I do not really suppose this will have effect.