Monday, July 21, 2008

NEW SUICIDE GIRLS ARTICLE (ABOUT SUICIDE!) and YOGA POSES and MAILING LIST


Got a new article up on SuicideGirls this morning.

I may come back and write more here about it later. But for now, this is the link.

The pic up there is what my friend Yoga instructor Patrick of Yoga Garden in Tokyo drew for me when I asked him what Yoga poses are good for people who want to work up to sitting 1/2 or full lotus. If you click on it you should be able to see a bigger version. It's saved so it can be blown up to A4 size, which is about the same as American standard letter size.

And finally, the folks who are putting on the Young Buddhist Retreat, which I'm gonna be at August 28-31 asked me for my mailing list. I have no mailing list. I feel bad just giving out the addresses of people who've written me saying "nice book" or whatever. So if you want to be on my mailing list, send an e-mail to spoozilla@gmail.com and make the subject heading "Mailing List." I will then construct a mailing list out of the addresses I get. This will be used for the Zen Peacemakers thing and future stuff. I promise you won't hear much from me because I'm very technically challenged.

251 comments:

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Anonymous said...

A new Page !

michael bardan said...

/clappers 0ff

every1 clap your hands, it's another day in paradise for mike_h.

the owl went: wei-wu-wu, wu-wu today.

mw@h

why so serious? :) said...

"Only when you have abandoned all perceptions, there being nothing objective to perceive, only when phenomena obstruct you no longer; only when you have rid yourself of the whole gamut of dualistic concepts...will you at last earn the title of Transcendental Buddha.


Anonymous said...
Apes spend their time throwing things away and picking them up again unceasingly, so it is with you and your learning. All you need is to give up your 'learning', your 'ignorant' and 'Enlightened' 'pure' and 'impure', 'great' and 'little', your 'attachment' and 'activity'. Such things are mere conveniences, mere ornaments within the One Mind."

only when you learn that you suck and that quoting religious bollocks is lame will you learn to stop taking yourself so seriously.

michael bardan said...

who's going to be in the aftermath to clean up after all these wannabe bodhisattvas are fleeing?

dr. dre, but of course.

michael bardan said...

now take another shot at obama v mccain, please.

NellaLou said...

John Lennon wrote it and Green Day, Marilyn Manson, Ozzy and many others repeated it. Still no one listened.

And someone decided John needed to be silenced, and Martin and Jesus and Gandhi and a lot of jews and gypsies and gays and some anonymous guy down the street and some woman who looked at someone else the wrong way and and and...

michael bardan said...

they don't read my "blog," because the answers are given in japanese and because the adhd drugs you give your kids can't possibly (since it's crack) help them through more than 5 minutes of silently observing.

Anonymous said...

"If one wants rules they can go to E-sangha-they've got 28 of them for posts by lay persons and a bunch more for ordained people. Less than 12 out of the 186 comments here would be "fit" for that place if one applies the rules exactly as stated."

Not only that but many of Brad's comments would not be allowed there either. Not just the profanity or name-calling, but a belief in literal rebirth can not be questioned there...it's part of the rules. I think ES is headquartered in Singapore..land of authoritarian laws and censorship..so I guess it figures.

michael bardan said...

& so the answer is to live freely in india?

you take the w0rld with you when they take you out.

or how's this 1:

anyONE in a w0rld system has the power to take the entire world OUT!

wmd:z my Ass!

but what happens is usually even the eaten when asked, they'll all of a sudden become all benevolent and say fuck 'em, let karma explain it to 'em...

oh, that's why dharma is so closely spelled to drama.

it's a goddam JOKE.

lighten up every1 and have some COKE.

Anonymous said...

shi7 last time i checked ozzy said:

i'm just happy to be anywhere.

nelly, get your literacy back in here and solve our pro'lems.

the motehrfukken indians and their elephants have enough atman to last 8 kalpa:z!

Anonymous said...

WHO THE FUCK CAN LISTEN TO THAT TEACHER DRONE MAN SHE"S ON ANTIDEPRESSANTS AND HER BOYFRIEND SLEEPS WITH HER BEST FRIEND ON THE SIDE AND THEY SAY I"M AUTISTIC FOR DARING TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FROM BIRTH.

THEN I TOTE GUNS UP THEIR ASS BECAUSE THEM DRUGS REMOVE ANY SENSE OF SENSIBILITY I GOT LEFT AND THEY SAY I"M RETARDED AND DIDN"T TAKE MEDICATION AND THAT"S WHY I SHOT "EM.

BILLION DOLLARS PHARMA DOLLAH AND THE LINE OF HOMELESS VETS WAS ONE FUCKING MILE LONG BEFORE THEY VANISHED IN THIN AIR.

WHERE THE FUCK DID THEY GO ASSHOLES?

THE ZOO?

THE WHITE AND THE BLUE BANDED TOGETHER IN HELPING US OUT.

TURN IN YOUR GRAVE, WASHINGTON YOUR CONSTITUTION USED TO AMEND THE BILL OF WRONGS: WHAT CAN THE GOVERNMENT DO FOR YOU TODAY?

MEDICATE YOU INTO OBLIVION. THERE'S LITHIUM IN NEW YORK WATER NOW, EH?

EAST COAST REPRESENT, HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY, MIKE_H PRAY FOR US IN YOUR SPORTY JAGUAR, NOT EVEN THE QUEEN AVALOKITESVARA CAN SAVE US NOW.

1984

BRING ON THE 8/8/8 OLYMPIX MOFO:Z!

Pink Floyd said...

In my rear view mirror the sun is going down
Sinking behind bridges in the road
And I think of all the good things
That we have left undone
And I suffer premonitions
Confirm suspicions
Of the holocaust to come.

The rusty wire that holds the cork
That keeps the anger in
Gives way
And suddenly it's day again.
The sun is in the east
Even though the day is done.
Two suns in the sunset
Hmmmmmmmmmm
Could be the human race is run.

Like the moment when the brakes lock
And you slide towards the big truck
"Oh no!"
You stretch the frozen moments with your fear.
[scream]
And you'll never hear their voices
"Daddy, Daddy!"
And you'll never see their faces
You have no recourse to the law anymore.

And as the windshield melts
My tears evaporate
Leaving only charcoal to defend.
Finally I understand the feelings of the few.
Ashes and diamonds
Foe and friend
We were all equal in the end.

"...and now the weather. Tomorrow will be cloudy with scattered showers
spreading from the east ... with an expected high of 4000 degrees
Celsius"

Hu Jintao said...

i graduated from uni in bucharest, r0mania.

i give a shit!

michael bardan said...

*3 pr0stratri0n:z*

1. 866.GO.HOGAN - hogan1.com, delivering kensho on your local freeway since 1918.

2. pink floyd - more dharma per square inch of lyrix than mc hawking and einstein combined.

3. the flag of the united states of america, red, blue, white, & yellow thassle:z all around & to the republik for which it stands, 1 nation, in my head, with liberty and justice for all except me, me, & mini me.

inv0ke dr. evyl self-defense mechanism:z now!

mother earth said...

The Comments Section is a mirror of our suffering.

The 'matrix' is doing zazen for most of us hairless monkeys to see.

Ulysses said...

"The 'matrix' is doing zazen for most of us hairless monkeys to see."

This stream of consciousness stuff is like what happens to a lot of people in zazen when the barriers start to fall. No wonder most people don't want to go there. To attach any emotion to it or dwell on it is useless.

Ulysses this ain't but I still think James Joyce would have a laugh.

BTW Joyce was a serious influence on Pink Floyd.

Matt said...

"If Brad doesn't like it..."

look, Brad may very well like it. I really can't speak for the guy. But he's done the leg-work by writing the article.

People are just insisting through the magic of internet anonymity that they get to keep playing their game. It's not to anyone's benefit, and I'm trying to understand the delight some are taking in behaving like this.

Removing all the buddhist bullshit from the conversation, are you telling me that "Them's the breaks?"

It's not a great sin or a denial of true being or whatever to express frustration at this (suffering is a big truth after all). But Buddhists are often accused of using their dogma to excuse otherwise not very cool actions (like suicide), the "anything goes" thing, and this seems to be another one of those cases.

yes, it's not up to me to dictate what you all should do, and no, I'm not advocating rules in the comment section.

But maybe...just maybe... people could start posting with the intent to make themselves understood instead of typing gibberish and giggling to themselves about how truly enlightened they sound, or at least more enlightened than Brad (the guy with the blog...). Posting with a sense of responsibility instead of marveling about how goddamn smart they must sound.

Or maybe I should just be patient and wait for summer vacation to be over?

peace
matt

NellaLou said...

Matt
I take your point. If I were to quantify what I post its only about 5% of what I'd like to say.
Maybe that's true of others as well.

Anonymous said...

my posts are 100% more than I want to say. I'm done, I hope. This is papancha for me. Errrrror :-)

michael bardan said...

lololololz

same here.

who the fuck are you, matt?

at least i got my full name there without another or 3 clinks necessary to find out.

& i take responsibility for all the suffering coming through the entire comments section.

now what?

wanna teach me how to do productive zazen, you piece of righteous shit?

you speak of suicide, man?

if you EVER really wanted to kill yourself TRULY, there ain't no fucking way in ALL HELLS you'd speak the way you do.

which is how i know you're a piece of shit rock trying to sport through zazen and preach to me THE RIGHT WAY.

fuck you and your dogen style then, man, keep your productivity to yourself and stop blaming the anonymous nature of the internet (and universe) for all your stupid problem:z!

bodhidharma said...

i told you assholes there ain't one goddam of holy ass in this entire not contraption nor the absence of anti contraption or the other 4 corners of bullshit i veiled over your noses.

but you ain't believed back then, you ain't believing illiterate hai hui or hui hai the heck knows to spell his name anymore.

anyway, spare me the kung fu jokes.

Anonymous said...

what, the internet isn't part of your moment?

asshole?

you're in the moment, but you can't be here now, eh?

so much for your zazen.

Anonymous said...

the pigeon eggs up your ass whoever still dreams of the matrix is what's doing zazen for you, bovine!

MU

there's NOT A DOG IN SIGHT you stupid fuck and all the zazen there can be done along with the EGO that's doing it belongs to YOU.

Anonymous said...

soto ladies and rinzai boys, can't we all just get along, like king rodney advised back in the city of angel:z?

Anonymous said...

Brass Ball:z Hairy Pouter for President!

Anonymous said...

Where's Mike_H when you need Him?

Geekin' Like a G Seepin' on Gin & Juice and signing BEEEEEG IT contracts to keep his small dick within the means of his dress.

Heil Elizabeth! Release the Grammar Nazi.

Woof, Woof.

Anonymous said...

What's the pro'lem, man, you can't focus and find THE ROYALTY of your DOGENNESS through the dust of these posts?

Is that your problem? Continually?

It's too much for you to scan 2oo posts, right?

Go ask mommy to help you out, maybe if she wasn't taking Prozac while breast feeding you, then you'd be a bit clearer now.

Worry not, buddhanature can be found in teh E, you know, because dancing all night long it's like zazen for 7 days straight, it can be done on E, oh yeh.

Here's a Peyote Button for you, so you can go to yet one more movie, just like this one.

YOUR DREAMS ARE MORE REAL THAN THIS PIECE OF SHIT YOU CALL WAKING LIFE.

sit zazen on THAT, you matrixed foo!

Anonymous said...

WHAT'S MY SECRET TROLL AGENDA YOU STUPID, STUPID, STUPID FUCK?

MAYBE IF YOU TYPED LESS, YOU'D SIT A TINY BIT MORE.

BECAUSE EVIDENTLY I CAN THROW A LETTER AT YOU AND YOU COME UNDONE.

but that's okay papa john, we'll keep the light on for you like i told you, here at motel 6, we give a fuck when you arrive.

you're already here.

baaaaaahahahahahahahah

lord shiva said...

i'm whoop yo ass already tied up to that general sherman of yours, i swear to all my asuras and bitches.

one more comment and i assplode!

Jinzang said...

Whenever someone criticizes Michael, he launches a flurry of vituperation. That's some serious lack of equanimity, Swami.

babbles said...

It is kind of a bummer that Brad wrote a very good Suicide Girls article and Patrick over at Yoga garden did a nifty Yoga guideline yet there does not really seem to be any relevant discussion of these, with the exception for the first very few comments.

Does anybody else have any input on stretches to help getting to half and/or full lotus? I have started Yoga and have been able to sit in seiza for years. However due to a childhood hip injury (injuries actually) I have kick-ass flexibility in one direction, and essentially zero flexibility in another and unfortunately I just do not have the range of motion to sit lotus.

In fact I have to see an orthopedic surgeon about my hip because it is bothering me so much - and worse case scenario I will be 30 years old with an artificial hip. Go me.

Anybody know if it is possible to sit lotus with an artificial hip?

michael bardan said...

jinzang babbling again...

why do you guys keep talking about brad and michael, dears?

why can't you ever, ever have something to say about yourselves, at least, if you MUST say?

anyway, your imbecile sensei has never ever insisted for full lotus for someone with health constraints.

please, for the love of all gawds and daemons of N directions, please do not go against what your body tells you.

it is BODY|MIND (heart|mind - caritas|prajna) you need in this equation of trying to free up.

please sit in a chair with your spine straight if you have to, it is more than enough.

how do you sit in space, you ask?

tie yourself down (like hakuin was tied into a chair for yaza with the help of his monks) in order to align your spine with the closest gravitational body.

*YAZA* FUCKERS AND IT'S THE BEST KIND - MIDNIGHT MARAUDER:Z

yady yada vituperation, jinny minny babbly yo, sit yo ass with me now YO!

bang

bangggg

bangggggggg

bangggggggggggg

michael bardan said...

/shuffle bell

dingggggggggg

don't touch this a friend of yours thinks you're not ready to hear yet.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=jlcA63n2JME

michael bardan said...

/clappers 0ff

now you can go take a nap and when i wake you up at 5PST8EST because we let you sleep longer if you're east sigheeeeee jes' coz we're wesssssssssigh represent please use these hell:z bell:z but remember:

this is why we run 8 days Rohatsu, to break through alaya-consciousness at once, without getting bogged down along the Way in abstract representations of what happens 1 thru 8.

g'night assholes!

L'Austin Myspace said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Justin said...

Michael,

Are am right in thinking that you're suggesting that you are our uninvited impetuous guru? Playing asshole in order to expose our neuroses and save us from ourselves?

Why would someone want to follow you?

michael bardan said...

I need your help and you need my help.

But you do not see where you can help me yet, because you do not understand what I am saying.

Nor can I spell it out for you.

Go deeper in your practice, is the only thing you can do.

I am not really asking anyone to follow anything, least of all Michael Bardan (lookat me speaking like Bob Dole now, another mummy).

Go deeper and try as hard as you can to stay focused.

Someone, well not someone, that stupid Fuck Matt said: Brad did the leg work, man.

There is MORE LEG WORK in this comments section than in 701283470162435 posts about suicide.

Suicide is impossible.

Self-sacrifice?

If only it could be possible, as well.

Anyway, SIT WITH IT.

michael bardan said...

PS: That part about "I need your help" is to give your fucking EGO yet another boost.

I need nothing nor ever will need anything, how could I fucking possibly ever need anything whatsoever?

Even Biggy Smallz in his 10 crack commandments spelled it out:

your momma set that ass up
properly gassed up.

!!!!!!!! STOP VALIDATING IN HIGHER OR LOWER FORMS !!!!!!!!

how many more times man, how many more times until you get it and propagate it through your weakass sangha?

brad is doing leg work?

*rolls eyes*

telling people from phoenix who fly airplanes to santa monica how to get to that goddam point where zazen translates into something PRACTICAL?

man, do something soon, or else JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP CONTINUOUSLY FOR LIKE 9 YEARS.

maybe that would be more beneficial?

who can say?

michael bardan said...

/time for another nap.

Justin said...

There are a million madmen out there who are absolutely persuaded that everyone else is deluded and feel compelled to correct them.

Go deeper in your practice, is the only thing you can do.
Do I need you to tell me that?

What brings you here hour after hour?

Rich said...

Phil-bob says:
"I'm also beginning to question zazen. By Brad's writings and the comments on this blog, including my own, one could assume we're all complete assholes.

Maybe this zen Buddhism stuff is all bullshit too."

The practice is a 24/7 job. Many people when sitting or not sitting use a technique like following the breath, keeping a koan, saying 'don't know' on exhalation, being mindful of their action etc. The contributors to this blog probably have a practice experience of 0 to many years, so don't judge zen by the comments. This is just a place to express whatever you are at a given moment.

Questioning Zen and who you are is Zen. Practice with others also.

I suffered a big disappointment yesterday, so today I will pratice a little more. After feeling disappointment, anger, anxiety there is no point to dwell and mire in it. I will move on and practice keeping clear mind, breath in breath out mind, don't know mind. With I mind there is suffering, without I mind you are free.

michael bardan said...

/clappers 0n

these morons are so stupid they do not believe i actually am trying to sit WITH THEM.

i sit anyway, while at it, i thought maybe you could sit with me.

is there anything else to do?

fucking idiot, hold hands with harry.

wait for stickam, then you'll believe, like scully :)

bell, belll, bellll, belllll
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Anonymous said...

Thanking us all
for our efforts here
each of us in our own ways
thanking my self also--my body/mind, still able to get onto a zafi, although need more pillows under the knees to get the 3 point foundation from which the rest rests upon, rises from.
thank you
to zazen itself,
thanks

Anonymous said...

typo
zafu not zafi

Dan said...

For a second I thought Zafi was the plural of zafu or something.

michael bardan said...

I forgot to /clap the end.

I'm sure you guys have not moved whatsoever.

Know: It will be OK in the end. If it is not OK, it isn't the end.

Harold and Maude said...

I believe I am an authority on suicide studies documented on film.

And if you want to be free, be free
And if you want to be me, be me
And if you want to be you,
I still love you

and so it goes...

Harry said...

Nursery rhymes can even be used to clarify it for stuck teenagers (like me!):

"Once I was going up the stair,
I met a man who wasn't there,
He wasn't there again today,
Oh, how I wish he'd go away" (Anon.)

Funny that: 1. He wasn't there at all and yet... 2. Even though we know he's not there it is quite valid for us to like him to go away.

Regards,

Harry.

Matt said...

Shel Silverstein ^

:)

-matt

Anonymous said...

Killing yourself IS SELFISH
Wanting your friend to live even though they suffer IS SELFISH too.
No need to choose one or the other as the righteous one or the evil one. I wouldn't want my friends to kill themselves, it would be devestatingly sad. I'm selfish for that. But if they kill themselves it would make me devistatingly sad, they would be selfish for that. So it's all more complex than we like it to be, but I still don't want my friends to kill themselves, maybe if they had some physical pain that was unbearable, maybe, but if it's loneliness or depression, come over and let's hang out bro.

Kathy said...

Hi,


HealthYoga.com is a Yoga Social Network for both the consumer and professional public. The sole purpose of HealthYoga.com is to offer a free outlet to the public for those seeking advice on a variety of yoga related topics from professionals. It is the only social network of its kind, directed specifically towards those in the yoga field with chat and web cam capabilities. I have come across your website and have noticed you link out to great resources online, we would love to be included within the list of great resources you acknowledge online. I appreciate your time and await your response.

Please email me back with your URL in subject line to take a step ahead and to avoid spam.

Thank you,
Kathy
kathy.healthyoga.com@gmail.com

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